the squeaky pickle gets the cheese

Archive for the ‘bizarre’ Category

Louisiana State Legislators Get Crunk As F**k With Hurricane Chris

July 2, 2009

(Gets really good after 2:15) This settles it. I’m moving to Louisiana and running for State Office. It looks like more fun than stand-up comedy. The way she was building him up I expected an IRAQ war hero missing half his face. In case you missed the lyrics… She fine than a bitch, ass and […]

If Wrestling ISN’T Gay, Then What Exactly Does Gay Mean?

June 18, 2009

I grew up loving the HULKSTER as much as the next guy…I thought. Then I saw how much the Ultimate Warrior “loved” him and I really had to question my fanhood. I need a bath to wash the filth away from having seen that. Still though, I must say that it is FAR LESS gross […]

Sports Inaction

January 15, 2009

Hey there sports fans and avid Squeaky Pickle readers! I watched enough ESPN, NFL Network and Fox Sports Net today to consider myself an expert in the world of athletic competition, let me peel my fat-ass out of the me-shaped dent in the couch and take you on a short tour of all things SPORT… […]

Dear Classic Rock Radio Programmers,

January 11, 2009

Hi guys, John Wessling here…long-time listener, long-time caller. The reason I’m writing you this letter is because I’ve been a fan for my whole life and I’m getting a little bored with your playlists. Seriously, you guys are phoning it in. Don’t get defensive, we can all tell that you haven’t done anything new – […]

Blagojevich, clearly a scumbag

December 12, 2008

I’m not a prejudiced person, BUT how did Illinois voters not see that Rod (#3 name for assholes ever) was going to be a douchey criminal? Who was he running against? Rapey McButtfinger? Nevermind the fact that Blagojevich sounds like a Bond villain’s name…or Dracula’s mother’s maiden name…just look at him! He’s only one degree […]

Emphasis on Comedy

December 8, 2008

HEADLINE NEWS When did the Republicans take over Amsterdam? Dutch conservatives are cracking down on marijuana cafes and red light district hooker windows in Amsterdam, because of “crime and safety” concerns. Dammit! When will this gentrification end? Let’s make a deal, we won’t put a strip club in the Epcot center if you don’t mess […]

When will they learn?

October 11, 2008

Air shows and Hot-Air Balloon launches are not the wholesome family fun trip they make them out to be. They start off fun and interesting… And then fiery death happens. Balloon Fire … worst cause of death this week. FYI … Lord Vader was seen in the airspace.

The Funniest part about the Old Lady who called Obama an Arab at a McCain rally is…

October 11, 2008

…she’s two years younger than John McCain Do you ever get the feeling that McCain and his staff/handlers are nervously dreading and secretly hoping someone shouts the n-word at one of these rallies? Sarah Palin evidently fired her sister’s ex-husband. So what though? What good is it to be a Governor if you can’t abuse […]

Bat Pug will protect us all

October 8, 2008

from weird Vader swinger couple!! You know they wear these when they do it. I want the video footage and I’m willing to pay cash. I don’t have it on me, but could put it together if I had to. We (me) here at SQUEAKY PICKLE are fully committed to weirdo Darth Vader pictures.

Authentic Guacamole

October 8, 2008

Ha! I’ve been cracking up all day. I’ve been doing a lot of driving, and there is this one otherwise-unremarkable Carl’s Jr. radio commercial they’ve been playing in LA where they are WAAAY proud of their new mega-heart-attack-burgers featuring AUTHENTIC GUACAMOLE… I had no idea there was a problem of IN-authentic guacamole. I imagine it […]